Oh No, Not Another Interuption, How To Deal With Everyday Distractions

Every day I find junk mail waiting for me, whether it issnail mail or email. Unless I deal with it immediately, Iwill be faced with piles of unwanted paper, or a full inbox,which just distracts me. It can be very frustrating tryingto find something which is buried in a drawer or hiddenunder a pile of papers. Not only is this distracting but italso takes time and can lead to added stress. Every time youlook at a pile of untidy papers you may just notice yourselfsighing and notice, too, how your energy is diverted intofeeling guilty about one more task not yet done.

Clear away the clutter - anything that will distract you,anything that takes up space, either physically or mentally.Examples include:

an untidy desk or car
a pile of unpaid bills
a disorganised wardrobe
unwanted gifts

What takes away your time and energy? Examples include:chatting on the phone or round the coffee machinefriends dropping round unannounced on a regular basisrelationships not workingsearching for things that you can't remember where you left

Just as we put sunscreen on us to protect against theharmful rays of the sun, we sometimes need to protectourselves from people, places and things. Prevention isbetter than cure! You can't stop other people from beingnegative or living their lives from one drama to another,but you can stop yourself from being sucked in by them.

Dawn had reached the point when all she wanted to do washand her notice in at work. As she was so behind with herwork, she logged on to her computer at home, after she hadput her children to bed. So much for trying to combinemotherhood with work - it just didn't seem to be working.During the day, her team continually interrupted her whenshe was about to start on her work, with questions she feltthat they really ought to know the answer to. "Why can'tthey work it out for themselves?" she said.

She realised that she had fallen into the trap, as so manymanagers do, of sorting out the problems for her teamwithout encouraging them to come up with their own answersfirst. She would ask them to leave it with her. And ofcourse, that was a monkey off their backs and one more on tohers. No wonder she felt stressed most of the time at work.

So she did two things to combat the problem. She increasedthe number of one-to-ones with her staff, and used the timeto talk through her team's workload and some of the issuesthey were facing. For the first time in a long time her teamtook responsibility for their own work. Second, instead ofinviting them to leave problems with her, she either askedthem to come back with their own ideas, e.g. a draft of aletter, or suggested that she would meet with them later inthe day, by which time they had normally sorted things outfor themselves.

Dawn recognised that her role as a team manager had notalways been as clear as it might have been. She thought shewas supporting them by doing their work for them. "I thoughtI was in control but nothing was further from the truth. Ihadn't realised how much the regular interruptions and mypoor time management contributed to stress." Her team,although shocked at first, started to thrive. They startedto feel more confident in their own abilities to solveproblems, and Dawn was always there when they neededsupport. She also seemed to be a lot less short temperedwith them, which they appreciated.

In reducing interruptions from her team, Dawn was settingstronger personal boundaries.

You can choose how you react or respond to others. You mayfind yourself reacting in the moment then spending the nexttwo days feeling awful that you snapped at someone. All thattime you are occupied with these thoughts and you could bedoing something about reducing the stress in your life.Think before you act even if it just for 30 seconds.

Emotions may get the better of you on occasion, if they doyou can stop things from escalating and causing more stress.

Most of us find it is hard enough to change ourselves. It iseven more difficult to change others. So if you findyourself stressed by the actions of others, change how youreact, rather than expecting others to change.

As you change, watch others change around you!

Carolyn Matheson is a nationally recognized Coach,Speaker and Author of "Yes to Less Stress."

Carolyn is a Master Certified Coach, and works with executives and their teams across theworld. She has pioneered an innovative approach to coaching,combining many years of high performance coaching with aholistic approach to work/life balance and has coachedhundreds of leaders and their teams. Her experience as apresenter, both nationally and internationally, spans 20years, with clients currently in Europe, Australia, theMiddle and Far East, and the USA.

Her new book, Yes to Less Stress is available online at her website, http://www.areustressed.com