|
|
| www.1001TopWords.com |
|
|
How To Get Attention, or: As You Read This, You Feel an Irresistible Urge to Go On Reading!
We all want attention. As children we crave the attention of our parents. Later in life, we want to be seen and noticed by friends and family. And when running most any type of business, we must attract the attention of our potential customers. But how do you get somebody's undivided attention? When you were an infant, you got attention by screaming and crying. Then your parents knew you needed your diapers changed. As an adult, you can try using the same method to get noticed. Sure, you will get noticed - but in a negative way! On the Internet, every website that is selling something has the need to be attention-grabbing within seconds; to make the visitors read about their offer rather than just clicking away. Some are then tempted to use the infant method of getting attention: screaming and yelling. Popup-windows that pop up in your face and obscure the page text you're just trying to read, is one example. Flash-generated intro's that stop you in your tracks and say "Heeey, wait - before you read about our products I've got this f-a-n-t-a-s-t-i-c visual effect to show you...!" is another example of attention-grabbing contraptions that actually defeat their own purpose. They visually yell and scream at you, and draw your attention to the fact that you'd better spend your precious time somewhere else. Then there is the type of web page that plays some sound effect the moment you arrive. Either it is a piece of music (always just the kind you hate!) or a recorded sales pitch. Oh yes, then there is the Blinking Text... which blinks at frantic pace, just right to trigger an epileptic seizure. One of my websites is called "The Hosting Finder". Primarily, it offers some reviews of carefully selected web hosting companies. I am not selling anything on this website, and so I do not feel it would be appropriate to use a hard-selling jargon in my introductory headline. Right now, it reads: "Finding a Web Hosting Provider That Will Take Good Care of Your Precious WebPages ... Can Be Confusing" (I then explain how I researched the web to find good hosting services based on un-biased customer ratings rather than hype.) Recently, a marketing consultant offered to look at this website and give me some feedback at no cost. I accepted, and after checking my landing page he declared the headline to be "generic and bland". Instead, he suggested the following: "Want An Objective 'Client Feedback' Guide To Help You Find A 100% Trustworthy, Inexpensive, And Complete Web Hosting Service Provider (Based On Survey Results, Not Marketing Propaganda) -- With All The Options You Need To Run Your Web Site Smoothly And Successfully? Avoid The Hosting Nightmare Of Trying To Keep Your Site Live And Running Smoothly... Stop Wasting Time And Money In Costly Bad Service" In my reply, I thanked him for his trouble. I also pointed out that this flood of words might not be the optimal way of building confidence in my integrity as the provider of impartial reviews on web hosting. Maybe I am wrong, who knows. Perhaps I should start yelling and screaming just like everybody else? But I just don't like the idea of doing that. I'd rather hypnotize people into reading my texts. Some marketing gurus advocate this approach. Here are a few examples of how you're supposed to hypnotize people: 1. As you keep reading this ad copy, you are feeling more and more compelled to experience all the benefits of our product. 2. The more you understand just how valuable our product could be to your life, the less you think about delaying this important purchase. 3. After you read this short ad you will feel like your problems are almost completely solved, all you will have to do is order. Well, don't you feel compelled to reach for your wallet right now?! These examples are not intended as a joke; they are seriously trying to persuade people. And maybe they are, although I personally find them more amusing than hypnotizing. - I'll make a pause here; I just feel I have to go out and buy something! :-) OK, I am back. Time to finish this little essay on how to get attention. Oh, you have read this far? So I have managed to keep your attention then! I did it by ... no, I won't give my secret away. You'll have to read my Special Report, which I'm selling for ONLY $97. But hurry, this exclusive limited special offer is expiring, and will always expire, at midnight; whatever day you happen to read this! :-) Kai Virihaur is a researcher, web developer, and artist. He runs The Hosting Finder ( http://www.thehostingfinder.com ), a web hosting directoryfeaturing articles and RSS feeds on web development, website promotion, and online marketing. The article may be used freely as long as this resource box, with intact hyperlink, is included.
|
|
|
|
RELATED ARTICLES
Space, and the Room for It Space exploration came a long way since I was the size of a measurable amount of it. Dog Poo - And You Thought You Had Problems In Southern Germany in a town by the name of Bayreuth, the German police are in a quandary. The town's dog poo is under attack. Park officials are desperate to resolve what could become an international incident. Unknown person or persons have been sticking little US flags into piles of doggie poo for over a year now. Bad Days and Bad Timing Have you ever noticed how family members always misbehave at the most inappropriate moments? Well, let me tell you, it's not just the little ones that spout off with remarks that make you want to don a cloak of invisibility. And the World Goes Round If you are a citizen of UK or Australia, you are permitted to snicker at this problem. Anchorage, Alaska, just opened its first two roundabouts at a major intersection. Essential Laughter Take time to laugh at yourself and the ridiculous in life. It is so refreshing to just laugh at your slips, peculiarities, forgetfulness, and fumbles. Humor has the power to dull the sharp edges of life and is a great tension reliever. Laughter stimulates the soul and boosts the immune system. Humor Under The Keyboards For me, the piano is the symbol of what is stiff, proper and elegant. It doesn't have faults, it is perfect. Pianists are the most perfectionist people in the world. They should not and can not make mistakes especially when performing. That is how I viewed the piano and the pianists. But then, I just found out I was wrong. A few researches and I have once again proven that appearances can be deceiving. How To Get Attention, or: As You Read This, You Feel an Irresistible Urge to Go On Reading! We all want attention. As children we crave the attention of our parents. Later in life, we want to be seen and noticed by friends and family. And when running most any type of business, we must attract the attention of our potential customers. Poor Rixs Almanac 8-13-05 Dear Poor Rix: A guy just invited me to a football game. I do not understand this event. Can you explain it? -- Sport Watcher Cant Get There From Here Can't Get There From Here Juneau is the capital of Alaska, but did you know that you cannot drive there from anywhere? You can fly into Juneau or you can take a ferry to Juneau, but you can't actually drive there. There are no roads into Juneau. Can you imagine not being able to drive to the State Capital in the state where you live? Normally, a lot of business and a lot of government takes place in a state's Capital. Not having easy access to it would create lots of problems, wouldn't it? Well, not in Alaska. In fact, up until a few years ago Juneau was two time zones or more away from the rest of the state. A few years ago Alaska had five time zones. Now we have only two time zones and our Capital is now in the same time zone as most of the state. Governor Frank Murkowski has a transportation plan that would include the building of a 65 mile road from Juneau to Skagway by the year 2010. That would connect Juneau by road to Anchorage, Fairbanks, and much of Alaska. Of course, you would have to drive through part of Canada to get to Skagway. Not a big deal, since Canada still likes us. However, many Alaskans are not too thrilled by the idea of building an expensive road to Juneau. According to Skagway business owner, Jan Wrentmore, "It will be as stupid an idea in 2010 as it is now." Part of the issue is that Skagway and Haines depend on the marine ferry system for business, since Skagway and Haines are the northernmost terminus for tourists who want to disembark the ferry and drive. The fear is that Juneau would become the northernmost stopping point for the ferry if a road is built from Juneau to Skagway. "We lose our status of what we've had for 100 years," said Jan Wrentmore. "It creates a competing port." Of course, the rest of Alaska doesn't really care about the competing port issue. The point is that the rest of Alaska doesn't really care about the whole issue. Our legislators at the State Capital seem to get along just fine the way things are currently. Change comes slowly in Alaska and I would guess that this issue will be talked about for a good many more years to come. If we talk about it long enough, eventually it will become a mute issue. We won't need a road. Eventually we'll be able to teleport ourselves to the Capital if we wish. Beam me up Governor. Restaurant Manager Gives Out Sexual Favors As Performance Bonus, Raise While many restaurant workers worry and sweat in anticipation of an imminent job-related performance review, employees at Applebee's in Westland have adopted an entirely different attitude toward the employment evaluation process. This is due in no small part to the fact that the general manager, Lisa Blanco, rewards superior employee performance the old fashion way. Health Club Regulars ?- Some of the People Youre Likely To Meet at the Gym One of the great benefits of belonging to a health club is the huge variety of exercise equipment that's available. It's also a great place to meet and observe a wide cross section of society. Here are just a few of the more notable health club regulars: Nine Movies That Make You Want To Yell, Stop Saying That Movie moments are nice things to share with the people you care about. Most of those shared moments consist of "Remember that one part when the guy with the thing?" and before they can finish you're interjecting with your own vague, "Oh totally, I love that part!" But occasionally this process extends beyond an inner circle and goes global in its reach. This is where a perfectly fine movie goes to the realm of annoying, because of our need to repeat the catchy lines contained within them. Here is a completely subjective list of movies that have been ruined by our need to copycat. The Army Corp of Engineers Having Issues Fixing Breach The Army Corp of engineers is having a tough time filling in the breaches in the levees. They have tried to use giant sand bags to drop into the hole. Three-Thousand pound bags have been dropped into the breach but to no avail. Lake Pontchartrain has a lot of weight behind it and fixing the breach and pumping out the water could take months. Voodoo Munchies Looking for a lighthearted and fun way to remove the negative energy of a certain disruptive person from your life, or from your mind, if the person in question has moved on? Consider the cleansing (and giggle-inspiring) effect of Voodoo Munchies. Marines Dont Take Crap We live in a world of widgets. People manufacture, distribute, and sell them. You name it, they're doing it. I have a friend who is a toilet paper salesman. God bless him. It's an honorable job and my butt and I give him a two ply thumbs up thank you butt it's not something I, personally, could ever do-do. I have a friend who told me once that the litmus test for taking a job is if you meet a girl and you're embarrassed to tell her what you do for a living then you probably shouldn't be doing it. Let me tell you about a career choice I was never embarrassed to tell girls about, the Marines. Make no mistake. The Marines are a business. We manufacture the world's finest fighting force, and distribute them worldwide to sell Democracy. If we have to, we'll kick their you know what, provide toilet paper to wipe their butts, and not even take their names because we wouldn't even know how to pronounce them. The enemy usually needs toilet paper when we get through with them because when they see the Marines land we usually scare the crap out of them. What can I say? War stinks! There's a lot of things Marines do that stink. We don't like it and complain that it's not what we signed up to do. We joined the military to see the world but all we end up seeing is bad weather and bad attitudes. So we say, "If I wanted to deal with this merde I'd have taken a summer vacation in hell or a winter vacation in France. The Germans spanked them, we had to save their butts, and now they're little ungrateful terds. I'd love to see a recruiter now. "You'll get to travel the world." Let's see, where I could have gone in the last ten years, Somalia, Afghanistan, Bosnia, and Baghdad. Wow, can you throw in a free trip to Liberia? It's hard to tell a service member that the grass is never greener on the other side because the places are young men and women go usually don't have grass but war has some positives. For instance, it educates the American people. If you asked most Americans what the capital of South Dakota was they'd say, "I don't know." If you asked them the capital of Afghanistan they'd say, "That's easy, Kabul." They also learn geometry too, hello Sunni Triangle. The only problem is in a few years they might make the mistake of trying to book a vacation to the Sunny Triangle because they heard it was, to use the parlance of our times, "The bomb." Marines actually have to go to these sewer holes. They have to live there and survive and it is no joke to them or their families but they love it. I used to get a kick out of Marines who said, "This is the hardest job in the world. You never sleep and when you do it's in the dirt; you get to go hiking, with a 100 pound rucksack on your back, and you get paid to visit areas of the world you'd never pay money to go on vacation to see, but it's the greatest job in the world. You'll love it." Make no mistake, Marines love their jobs and as you probably know, are "The Few, The Proud." Marines are prouder then game roosters and meaner then cocks. If the Marines made toilet paper it would be two ply steal plates in order to cover their butts when they use the head. Being is a Marine is a dirty job but the best part of it is that we don't take crap from anyone. Every young man and woman should do a stint. If you're interested, go down to your local recruiter and put your signature on a piece of paper, preferably one ply. Finding Lost Children A couple of days ago I had to go to a dealership to get my car fixed. I am not implying that I don't want my car to have children, because who am I to make that choice? More so, I was sent a letter about a recall on one of the parts (the hazards, actually), meaning that the dealership was obligated to fix my car while I watched television and drank free coffee from a vending machine? Stopping Bad Breath Bart "Pee-ew! You smell like a skunk soaking in sardine nectar for a week."OK, so I can be a little candid every now and then. It's not something I would say to Attila the Hun during a pre-battle pep rally. But it was not Attila the Hun standing in front of me. It was just my buddy Bart."Pee-ew! You have bad breath."So when the phone rang that night, the last person I expected to greet me in a cheery voice was Bad Breath Bart. "Hey, Happy Guy. I'm feeling great," he said. "Want to guess why?""You just won the gold medal for the ten-meter turkey toss?""Nope," he replied. "But thanks for the tip. I'll start training for it tomorrow.""OK, I give up. Why do you feel so great?""Because I discovered an easy way to stop bad breath," he declared. "Want to guess how?""You bought a book on stopping bad breath and you are following the instructions?""Sa-ay, that's a good idea," Bad Breath Bart said. "But that's not it. My plan is even simpler. I covered up my bad breath.""Bart, that won't work. Since Julius Caesar first invaded Paris and declared 'Veni Vidi Vino', people have been trying to cover up their breath. But mint just is not strong enough.""Bingo!" he shouted. "Mint is too weak, so I found something stronger. Want to guess what?""You've been rinsing with five-week-old milk?""Nope.""You've discovered that cologne is best taken internally?""Nope.""You downed a bottle of vanilla extract, mistaking it for beer?""Nope."This guessing game was giving me headaches and foot cramps. "I give up, Bart. What's your secret to stopping bad breath?""Garlic," he declared."Garlic?""Garlic. Now nobody can smell my bad breath, because all they smell is garlic," he beamed."Garlic?""Of course, there are some side effects," Bad Breath Bart noted. "For instance, my pet vampire has run away. And this afternoon I blew a kiss to my wife, and she slammed the door on my face.""Can I offer an alternative, Bart? Something that won't put your nose in a cast every time you get the irresistible urge to blow at your wife?""Sure.""Try using some mouthwash with cetylpyridinium chloride in it. That always works for me.""Wow. That's a mouthful," Bad Breath Bart exclaimed.I was glad to have finally given Bad Breath Bart a mouthful that would actually help him cure his problem. I did not anticipate the call I would receive the very next evening."Hey, Happy Guy. Thanks for the tip," Bad Breath Bart said. "That cetlip... cettap... centapyr... That unpronounceable mouthwash ingredient is superb.""Excellent!" I was thrilled that he had taken my advice and that it was working so well."Yeah. It really tastes great," he continued."Tastes great?""You bet. And so filling, too."Suddenly I felt an ominous sensation closing in. "What do you mean by 'filling'?""After taking that cetilp... cettep... certip... that unpronounceable concoction, I don't feel hungry anymore," he explained."Bart, what did you put in that concoction?""Oh, the usual ? ten scoops of ice cream, a cup or two of milk, a bag of chocolate chips, half a banana, some corn flakes, a wombat's ear and the juice out of the maraschino cherry jar," he responded."But that won't stop your bad breath.""Oops. I also added that cetip... cetpe... certilp... that unpronounceable ingredient," he added. "It sure tasted good."Just then, my wife entered the room. "Honey, I just made you one of your favorite banana-strawberry milkshakes," she said with a smile.I looked at the glass she placed in my hand. I looked at it from the top. I looked at it from the bottom. I looked all around it."What are you looking for," she asked.I knew she would not believe me. "Chocolate chips and corn flakes." To See Or Not To See I went to the eye doctor the other day. I thought it was time to have my eyes checked. It turned out to also be a reality picture checkup. Your Stars Part 3 Libra Funny Things We Dream I often wonder why I wake up so happy, ready to start the day. When I was younger I'd whack the alarm clock, for the fourth time, grumble out of bed and stomp around with a major sour puss. Now I'm up before the alarm clock most mornings, and I don't grumble, not as often as I used to anyway. I'm often anxious to see what the day will bring.
|
| © Athifea Distribution LLC - 2013 |