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An Unquestionable, Positive Demeanor - How to Maintain it
Near the end of December 2004, I received an email from one of my colleagues that I had not heard from in awhile saying, "Donna, I'm wondering if I might have a moment of your time in the near future to ask you some questions about what I've observed to be your unquestionable, positive demeanor. Any time that I've encountered you, I've found your attitude is very infectious, and I'd like to talk to you about how you maintain it and where it springs from." To be honest, I was astonished by this request. I know I'm a positive person but I was surprised to have such an impact on someone I rarely interact with. Before meeting with my colleague, I made a few notes to prepare. I've decided to share these notes with you as well. To me, if we can remain positive, we will enjoy much more success with overcoming overwhelm and achieving our desired results. 1. Develop An Optimistic Outlook. Always try to see the best in everything. Try to focus on all that is now possible rather than worrying about what might be impossible. 2. Practice Detachment. Strive to let things go. This isn't easy to master, but if you keep this objective in mind and do it more often, it will become easier. 3. Select Your Fights And Arenas. When we work and live with others, we need to consciously choose when it's important to fight for something and when it's acceptable to compromise. Sometimes when you stop and think about it, you'll realize that certain battles are not worth having. Other times you'll decide it's more appropriate to deal with it at a different time and in a different place. 4. Choose Your Environment, Leader, Colleagues And Team. People often choose their work, or their position without considering the types of people they will be working with. Before selecting an opportunity, consider the personality and style of the people you'll be working around, whether you'll be compatible with them, and whether you'll be able to learn from them. 5. Strategize On The Win. Professional athletes and teams do this - why wouldn't we? Planning how you'll achieve your desired goals improves the likelihood you'll succeed. Strategically thinking about how to achieve your daily, weekly and monthly goals will help you feel great. You'll have a plan and you'll be taking regular steps towards fulfilling it. 6. Ask Yourself Every Day, "Did I Win Today?" Consider the day a win if the results you felt positive about outweighed those that you didn't feel very positive about. If, overall, a certain day doesn't feel like a "win", immediately plan how to make the evening better, and how to set yourself up to win the next day. 7. Direct Your Passion Toward A Special Cause Find a special cause that moves you and contributes to improving someone else's quality of life. You'll feel wonderful about making a difference. When you know you're helping the greater good, you'll feel worthwhile and, as a consequence, you'll experience ongoing pleasure. 8. Focus On How Can You Help Others. Helping others can have an enormous impact on your outlook and attitude. Make sure your definition of personal success includes helping other people and making a positive difference in their lives. 9. Associate With Great People. As much as possible, avoid spending time with "Negative Nellie's" and people that you can barely tolerate. These people will drain your energy. Instead, hang out with great, positive people that suit your style; their attitudes will be contagious. 10. Know Yourself Well. To truly be positive, you need to consciously, deeply know what you really like, what you genuinely don't like, what you are good at, and what you are not good at. If you understand these things about yourself, and make decisions according to your interests and strengths, you will naturally be more positive. 11. Take Great Care Of Yourself. If you don't take exceptional care of yourself, it will be more challenging to have a positive demeanor. Getting sufficient sleep, eating healthy food, exercising and having fun all influence your disposition. 12. Enjoy The Ride. Life does provide challenges but we grow and learn through adversity. So enjoy it! Copyright 2005 Donna P. Lendzyk Donna P. Lendzyk is a professional coach and creator of the Overcome Overwhelm System. She coaches businesswomen to "Overcome Overwhelm and Achieve Their Desired Results." She is the author of the multi-media "Overcome Overwhelm eProgram." To learn more about her eprogram and sign up for more FREE tips like these, visit her website at http://www.OvercomeOverwhelm.com
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